PARENTS CAN GRADUATE, TOO

          Smartly dressed people at schools are crying. Graduation is a milestone parting of the ways. Parents boo-hoo at separation, even as soon-to-be released children are crying with relief.

          Buck up, there�s a little silver lining in that empty nest for you.    College Kid Departs

          There is a run on Kleenex when mom wails, �My baby!�  College Kid�s car is stockpiled with food, blankets, new clothes, computer and mini-appliances. Parents plead (with low expectation), �Promise to call me every night, don�t forget!�

          Can their marriage survive the gaping new hole left by College Kid? Whatever will they talk (or scream) about now that their darling is gone?

          There is a new home shrine. Leave the kid�s bedroom exactly as it is! New tears fall - Oh, where does the time go?

          Graduates, on the other hand, are thumbs-up and dancing a jig. Adventure, a new life, no parental police units. Can�t wait to live life the way nature intended!

          A Year or Two Later

          College Kid now appreciates home life.  Scoping out the home refrigerator, CK thinks, �Wow, look at all the food I didn�t have to buy and put away myself.�

          Wistfully eyeing the family washer and dryer, a thought occurs, �Boy, it sure beats hauling stinky sacks down to the campus laundromat six blocks away. What a drag that�s been.�

          Stretching out, space is the new frontier. Not like the cell-sized dorm room shared with two roommates, and a bathroom down the hall (which nobody ever cleans!).

          Sinking into the family barca-lounger in front of the wide screen TV, College Kid muses about moving back home someday. It�s comforting to know some things never change. What�s for dinner, Mom?

          But change has arrived with a few parental epiphanies. Remember the gaping hole created by College Kid�s departure? 

Well, it�s been paved over.

          CK�s parents have rediscovered each other. Time and privacy is an addictive pleasure. No longer under a timetable to cook meals or play chauffeur, mom can call dad for a downtown dinner after work. Hey, she can even make a Girls� Night Out a regular routine.

          Now here�s a novel experience � full control of the telephone. When that answering machine light blinks, a slog through 35 teen messages has magically disappeared.

          With newly freed-up evenings, it�s time to tackle something new -  Tai Chi? Quilting for beginners?  The world is your oyster, and marine biology has been on back burner for too long.

          College Kids are dumbfounded at the very idea their parents may actually get a life.

Sometimes reinvention goes too far.

          Parents announce, �We�re selling the house.  We don�t need this much space anymore.�

All across the nation, kids are slack-jawed over the utter blasphemy of shrine desecration.

�But what my room?� they demand.

          �It�ll be there, it�s just going to be a den now.�

          Yes, parents, dry your tears. College-bound Kid parades by in cap and gown, but it�s your graduation into a brand new life, too.  Enter the Class of 2004!

� May 28, 2004 Suzette Martinez Standring

Contact Suzette

Print This Page